Certified Curmudgeon

This morning’s Star Tribune had an article about some research at Cargill, “one of the world’s largest food-ingredient makers”. Among the things that Cargill is working on is getting the heart-healthy beta-glucan out of oatmeal, for use in other products. The challenge is reported to be getting the beta-glucan without getting the “lumpiness of oatmeal” or a “cardboard-like texture”. When I was a kid, we were glad to have oatmeal to eat, lumpy or not. As the governor of Pennsylvania, Edward G. Rendell, would say, we are becoming a nation of wusses. What’s wrong with eating something lumpy with a cardboard-like texture? Builds strong jaw muscles, that’s what I say.

When I was young, we were intensely interested in understanding who did things. For example, we wondered:

  • who put the bomp in the bomp buh bomp buh bomp?
  • who put the ram in the rama lama ding dong?
  • who put the dip in the dip dee dip dee dip?

These were major issues. We focused our energies on trying to understand who had done something. No we have shifted over to trying to undo what nature has already done for us, free of charge. Now we are reduced to attempting to avoid lumps. Wusses! Wusses, I say!!

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